Random Computer Jokes
Welcome to another Java script tutorial,this tutorial is useful for fun sites,and funny sites.This code allows you to click it and show you a funny joke(I realy don't find it funny)but you change what it says.
Here is a preview:
http://i29.tinypic.com/23jmu7r.jpgAnd here is the code,just remember to put it in Headers or Footers,realy does not matter.
<SCRIPT LANGUAGE="JavaScript">
<!-- Distributed by http://www.hypergurl.com Begin function stClock() {
window.setTimeout(
"stClock()", 1000 ); today = new Date(); self.status = today.toString();
} function getMessage() { var ar = new Array(20) ar[0] = "Buy a
Pentium 586/90
so you can reboot faster." ar[1] = "2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values
of 2." ar[2] = "Anything that can go wrong will go wrong." ar[3]
= "Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes." ar[4] = "My
software never has bugs. It just develops random features." ar[5] = "If
anything simply cannot go wrong, it will anyway." ar[6] = "Best file
compression around: \"DEL *.*\" = 100% compression" ar[7] = "The
Definition of an Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones in." ar[8] =
"If
everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked
something."
ar[9] = "BREAKFAST.COM Halted...Cereal Port Not Responding"
ar[10] =
"BUFFERS=20 FILES=15 2nd down, 4th quarter, 5 yards to go!" ar
[11] =
"It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so
ingenious."
ar[12] = "Bad command. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaay..." ar
[13]
= "Every solution breeds new problems." ar[14] = "As a computer,
I find your faith in technology amusing." ar[15] = "Two wrongs are
only
the beginning." ar[16] = "Shell to DOS... Come in DOS, do you copy?
Shell to DOS..." ar[17] = "All computers wait at the same speed."
ar[18] = "DEFINITION: Computer - A device designed to speed and
automate
errors." ar[19] = "Success always occurs in private, and failure in
full view." var now = new Date() var sec = now.getSeconds() alert
("Quote:\r"
+ ar[sec % 20]) } // End --> </SCRIPT>
<CENTER>
<FORM> <INPUT TYPE="button" VALUE="Random Computer
Jokes"
onClick="getMessage()"> </FORM> </CENTER>
If you want to edit what it says,edit these codes:
"If
everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked
something."
ar[9] = "BREAKFAST.COM Halted...Cereal Port Not Responding"
ar[10] =
"BUFFERS=20 FILES=15 2nd down, 4th quarter, 5 yards to go!" ar
[11] =
"It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so
ingenious."
ar[12] = "Bad command. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaay..." ar
[13]
= "Every solution breeds new problems." ar[14] = "As a computer,
I find your faith in technology amusing." ar[15] = "Two wrongs are
only
the beginning." ar[16] = "Shell to DOS... Come in DOS, do you copy?
Shell to DOS..." ar[17] = "All computers wait at the same speed."
ar[18] = "DEFINITION: Computer - A device designed to speed and
You can get more information on this site
http://www.hypergurl.com/randompun.htmlIf you get any errors,please comment.This is not that complicated.
Thank you for your time.
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